This has certainly been a week of going to the extreme, and quite the opposite extreme from the beginning of the season. Instead of enjoying the mountains and the great outdoors I am slowly settling into a routine of exploring the nightlife of Queenstown, its other great enterprise.
Getting used to everything in Queenstown, I am needing to reach farther and farther outside of the obvious to find new adventures and keep things exciting, as it always goes, and again as always, when I start to work a lot I collapse into my bad habits again, of eating and drinking too much and hardly getting enough sleep. Every moment I seek to take in more and more of life and today, Saturday, I am finally taking the time to lie in bed and type and reflect on the week. I have only been at home this week to sleep and get ready for the next long, exciting day. The earliest I arrived home this week was about 10:30pm on Thursday night, after having been out Wednesday night past 4am and trying to hide the puffiness of my eyes which has been continuing to develop over the later part of this week. The appearance of my face is the one thing that puts me over the edge as far as cutting back on the things that are eating at my health. I haven't even felt truly sleepy or tired throughout the week, nor have I had so much to drink that I've felt sick. I just hate looking old when I do such a good job of keeping myself healthy. I'm actually quite proud of myself that I haven't gotten sick at all, and though I've had more than my fair share of fried foods and sugar this week I've been eating quite a bit of healthy food to keep me going.
I wish I could take the time to accurately recount everything that's happened this week. My Monday through Friday has felt like two Thursdays, two Fridays and a Saturday, and I feel that to write up five days all at once would either be to explain what I did, or how it went. I suppose this will end up being a mixture of both!
Monday 19 July
When I arrived in the office on Monday morning I finally met Matt, another exec with his own private office over-looking the lake and fancy ensuite. Matt had been away for the last month traveling, mostly in the UK, which was why I had never seen him, but he seemed a bit more personable than most other people in the office, though I don't see him very often. I'm still glad I introduced myself that morning and made a good impression.
I worked steadily throughout the day and stopped a few times to write out what I had done on Sunday, a nice way to break up the day and preserve sanity while sitting at the front desk taking phone calls from creditors. I'm getting a bit more bold as well as far as checking my email throughout the day, or even taking a peak on Facebook, though sometimes I check it compulsively, and I hate that trapped in the office feeling I get, that leads to cravings for comforts such as food, sugar, caffeine, or internet-based social interaction. That's always the worst part about any job, and it even comes with ski instruction, knowing that you're there working for a set amount of time instead of with a set task or purpose, that when you finish it you are free to do something else. Being a slave to the clock always makes you feel like you are wasting precious time in your life and you feel the need to stick other comforts into that time, such as snacking or checking empty email boxes.
In the afternoon I ran downstairs to Night n Day and grabbed a chicken satay wrap for about $7, which I stuck half of in the microwave and saved the rest for the next day. It was quite tasty and filling enough. My life is back to eating lunch outside during our small window of heat and sunshine between noon and 2:30pm, but for a few weeks I think I'll survive. Besides, no one harasses me about times here, of when I get in or leave or when I eat lunch or go for a stroll or how long it takes to do any of my tasks. For me it's a stress and drama-free work place, which is difficult to find in an office situation, but everyone else seems stress and drama-free and a bit more light-hearted because they are all here because they love the mountains and the outdoors, and of course, we do run bars and liquor stores. I feel bad for Hannah's friend Bobbi who works in the legal office. That must be quite dry, especially compared to our crew.
I worked steadily throughout the day and very happily accepted a babysitting job with Andre for his 2 year old son Lennon. I didn't know what to expect, but it was a Monday and I do love working. After work I went to Pub on Wharf. On Mondays and Tuesdays they have $10 dinners, and even though I wasn't quite in the mood for meat, having eaten such a nice rib dinner there the night before, and the chicken from the wrap, I decided to get the rib eye over mash. I began to read a new book, written by a New Zealand author and taking place in a fictional New Zealand town. I haven't gotten far enough into it to figure out what it's really about, but it seems to be about life's experiences, as is most writing.
The dinner was quite a small portion, in my opinion, though unfortunately this week has been the start of my binging and gluttony, which I must certainly curb ASAP. I would say it started with my massive rib dinner, except that I quite earned that, walking down and up the hill with the ski gear, skiing all day, and waiting until 9pm to eat it. Though I really do think that it had been my Pandora's box. I ate my nice tender (though a bit fatty) rare rib eye steak, and wasn't quite satisfied after eating the potatoes which were really just filler, and I'm fairly certain the point of the cheap meal is to get you to add a salad or veg for another $4.50 and a beer as well, effectively bringing the dinner back up to $20, and honestly I doubt I'll go for the cheaper dinners like this again. Fraser's also has a $20 steak and two handles of beer on Mondays, and Monty's does $15 steak dinners Monday and Tuesday nights, which I just don't see as a bargain because I actually feel full and satisfied after a curry dinner for $10.
I sat at my table by the fire until about 6pm, when another couple was quite happy to snatch my table before I even left since it was starting to get busy, and I walked around looking for a bite of dessert and place to read for a bit longer before I babysat at 7pm. If the steak and mash dinner was the first vice flying out of Pandora's box, the dessert was the second. I had walked past just about every restaurant the night before looking at menus and deals and desserts, and Surreal seems to be the nicest place to sit and get a dessert for less than $10. I got the chocolate mud cake with rum and raisin sauce on top, which they use fresh rum to light on fire, though not much of mine lit and the added rum and alcohol flavor really made a decent dessert a phenomenal dessert. There wasn't much icing – in fact maybe none at all, but instead the cake was smothered in chocolate fudge sauce, when mixed with the vanilla ice cream and rum dripping around the dish, was just amazing. I savored every tiny crumb and lick of ice cream and drop of rum, taking my time to read in between bites. At around 6:50pm I headed out to the Q1 apartments to meet Andre and Lennon.
My night began upstairs in Simone's apartment, where Lennon was watching TV with Georgi, Finn, and the Balinese nanny whose name I just can't quite grasp – I think it sounds a little like Aya but I know that's not it.
We watched the Disney channel all night, which had very cute programming from Micky Mouse to Winnie the Pooh to a few other animated shows like Bob the Builder and one I particularly liked where all the creatures were car/animals who lived in a jungle and liked to zoom around. After about an hour, when Simone was heading out, she set me up with Lennon downstairs. Andre had told me that Lennon was still on Bali time, four hours earlier, and wasn't expected to go to sleep, though I should put him in bed if he fell asleep on the couch. I was waiting all night for him to get sleepy, but he was more wide awake than I was when everyone got in at 11:30pm. I was really hoping he would sleep because I wanted to sleep, and I had to make sure his interest was held otherwise he would wander off down the hallway or try to open cabinets. If I wandered off so far as the kitchen he would notice, and my fatigue and boredom caused me to munch on an apple and some crackers, which I definitely wouldn't have done if I had been able to lie down and relax.
Still, the night went well, and everyone was quite cheerful when they got back home. They knew Lennon wouldn't get to bed until daddy got there, so Andre handed me my money and then put him to bed. We hadn't discussed rates at all, but I suppose Simone must have told him what I was charging the other family because I noticed a pink $50 and a green $20 and something else in there and put it my pocket, thinking even at least that much would be enough, but when I counted it after I walked out of the building I noticed there was another 50, making the total $125!
I was very much on a money high, and combined with the fresh cool air of the night it woke me up so I wasn't so sleepy anymore. Thus began my week of being wired and not getting enough sleep! As I was walking back I felt that the night was quite warm, and I had stored up quite a bit of warmth in the sauna-like apartment with extreme under-floor heating, and saw a group of people in dressing gowns and pyjamas gathered at Fraser's. I felt the energy of the night flooding through me, though I had no desire to go out alone, and knew the fatigue deep inside me and that the facad of energy would be just enough to last me on my 20 minute walk home.
About half way up the hill I stopped to admire the light from the near-full moon flooding the town still noisy from the group of young party animals on the pier, living life as it should be. After I rounded York St I met up with Floyd and his girlfriend Jo from Australia, who had been out for the evening and were wandering back home. When I arrived home I was still wired from the end of my evening and found it difficult to get to sleep right away, but I have started playing Star Ocean a bit before bed, which settles me right down into a nice comfortable happy place so I can sleep.
Tuesday 20 July
Raisins – I'm not sure if they were a mistake or a blessing. When I was at home in May I started to eat some raisins, mostly being on a diet of fruit, vegetables, water, and more fruit, mostly watermelon because of the heat. I started putting them in my oatmeal and enjoyed the sweetness yet simplicity of them, in a way that I've never really enjoyed raisins before. I picked some up on Monday morning when I stopped into the Alpine Supermarket to get bananas and apples on my way to work. I've decided it's not really worth doing a food-carrying triangle, where I buy food, carry it all the way up to the house just to pack it in my bag to bring down to work, then bring the empty containers home at night, so now I do a lot of my cooking and food storage at the office.
I've been munching on raisins all week. I tend to munch a lot at work, which is another huge change from my first week at work. The first week I would have my oatmeal at home, an apple mid-morning, maybe a carrot mid-day, then ravenously seek curry or some sort of comforting, delicious meal right at 5pm. This worked well, since my body was used to a lot of physical activity and didn't really crave or require food during the day beyond my morning oatmeal and some fruit and veggie snacks, then the early meal was enough to carry me through the evening. During my second full week I started to snack on less healthy things, such as the little mint chocolates that Ann had found in boxes that week, and my boredom caused me to crave something to chew on, such as fruit flavored gum. I can't find any good tasting gum that doesn't lose flavor quickly other than mint gum, and the gum I get at Night n Day is always a bit on the stale side.
I've been starting to wander around town and explore some lunch specials, such as the $8 green curry from @ Thai and my $10 venison kebab over couscous lunch from Solera Vino, where I absolutely had to try venison here, and was in the mood for a relaxing sit down lunch as a break from the office. There's just so much food in this town to “try” it's easy to convince myself that I'm treating myself, when really I'm just tricking myself into letting myself eat out too much. At least the food quality here is good in terms of nutrition and freshness, and the portions are a healthy size. I could never eat out this often back at home!
Still, I've been munching and munching on things at work, mostly carrots and apples, but sometimes the candies and gum, and now the raisins. I thought I could eat just a few in the oatmeal or a handful in the morning, but even from Tuesday it got to the point where I would go back to the box in the kitchen and keep reaching for a handful. It really must look like I am always eating, and I find that when I'm sitting at the front desk and trying to waste time I tend to much more, and when I have an all-day project to do that isn't so painful, or if the day gets broken up by running errands, I don't eat out of boredom, so next week my goal is to try to keep myself working on something so I don't munch as much, though I highly doubt that will be possible with all the random tasks I have to do and the desire to have more time to myself, even if it's only a few minutes here and there on the internet or writing something.
Once again I was faced with the desire for food and social interaction after work, and decided to meet up with Nat to grab a beer and dinner since he had the night off. I had intended for a quieter night, but again got swept up in the night's energy when we were sitting having a quiet beer at Surreal and bursts of young guys dressed scantily like Indians would run in, do a crazy-looking shot at the bar, then run out, only to be replaced moments later by another group of 6 schoolmates. I just had a to ask the guy standing at the bar, looking like he had been managing the affair; apparently a large group of students from Sydney University make an annual trip to Queenstown and partake in events like crazy dress up pub crawls and ski trips. The guy said he was studying film, but I just had to ask because I knew there had to be a group of engineers and scientists somewhere, and when I saw a group of less wildly decked out guys who weren't so good at doing the shots I turned to Nat and said, 'Those must be the computer science majors.'
Nat wasn't terribly amused by the show, and I can tell that as an older local he's probably seen it all and of course isn't too keen on seeing scantily-clad young men, but I like the air of being surrounded by people who are enjoying life, and it was still early enough in the evening that things, while getting there, weren't too terribly messy. Their bar crawl involved getting clues at each location as to which the next bar was, and their clue at Surreal was “northern territory” which immediately made me think of Canada, but the next bar was Red Rock, which is pretty much all the Northern Territory of Australia contains.
I wasn't terribly impressed by the beer at Surreal, though after tasting 2 of them I felt awkward and had to order one so I got the Speight's Ale, which I had seen my friends at the hostel drinking. I wasn't terribly impressed, nor was I in the mood for beer, honestly, but it was drinkable. I didn't like the Hop Rocker much, a little too bitter. We stayed at Surreal until about 7:30, before which time I was trying to decide whether more curry sounded good, a safe and delicious bet, or whether I wanted to try the $10 fish n chips dinner at PJ's up on Camp St. The people-watching in Surreal, however, was too interesting to pass up. As we were leaving there was a plump woman who I heard complaining about them letting in the University boys, 'Isn't there a dress code or something?' she asked snobbishly, as if she should be one to talk, with her purple streak of hair and garish fashion sense.
I'm glad I had tried the fish n chips up at PJ's, but to be honest I didn't really enjoy it and I wouldn't go back. The chips were boring and the fish was tasteless and everything was terribly greasy, just the kind of food I don't like to eat. Even dousing it all with malt vinegar, which tasted watered-down, didn't help. Oh well, live and learn and explore, even if it takes a toll on your body. We did meet some nice American women at the table next to ours, two from NY and one from Colorado, who had actually just met each other as they were traveling in their tour group.
After dinner, thoroughly unsatisfied with my meal (I suppose that's a trend this week with my $10 dinners) I was craving dessert, and took poor Nat on a wild chase around town since I always need to walk a bit before having dessert. I had already decided in my head that the dessert at Surreal was the best but we took a little walk, even out as far as the Bath House, which I had yet to check out, a tiny little place which seems like it would be nice during the day and at dusk, since every table had a fantastic view of the lake and the southwest. We also stopped into Les Alpes, which I hadn't yet been into, and the décor had a rustic feel, like a mountain town in the USA, or sort of a down-home feel and I could definitely see placing the interior in Tennessee with its thick wooden chairs and tables and brightly colored home-spun decorations.
***
I really think the whole need for dessert this week, and all the munching and cravings and irritability was due to my lack of sleep, which results in a lack of exercise and a lack of adrenaline. It was building on itself all week, the need for just a little bit more and a little bit more, instead of going home and resting. My lack of satisfaction with food was just a desire to have something just a little tastier, a little richer, a little more rewarding each time, this craving for something just a little bit more each time, rather than settling down and taking it easy, so I can appreciate everything when I have it. This week I certainly have become a junkie, not just with food, but with everything, which is why today I am trying to rest, and bring my baseline down. I always try to retain my sensitivity to things, such as caffeine, by not having too much, but in this week it was just too much of everything. It's been brought to the extreme and now I need to dull myself just to be able to enjoy anything. The excessive drinking has also dulled my taste for food, and causes me to crave it and shovel it into my mouth. Every day this week I've been on the “starting tomorrow” diet, where I ignore what my body is telling me and just go over the top. Even though I have a limited time to go skiing, I feel that taking a day off from life and playing video games, just being glued to the computer, is honestly the best thing for me to do. It's like a hangover from life, from food, alcohol, caffeine especially, and society. I'm sitting now in my bed, as I have been since I woke up two and a half hours ago, still typing, staring out over the lake to the mountains, half basking in the sun, speckled with snow just on the tip tops now, on the south-facing side. I wanted to take a jog to the aquatic center today, go swimming, then pick up some free weights at the shop in Frankton, now that I have the opportunity, but, as silly as it sounds, after calling the Leisure Center and finding out that they have not towels, soap, shampoo or hair dryers in their locker rooms I'm actually quite turned off to the whole idea. I was looking at the trip to the aquatic center as a luxury, something I'd happy make the trip out for and pay the $8 for in order to pamper myself, but the thought of lugging a towel and having to gather together soaps and shampoos, and even bring my hair dryer if I want to be comfortable afterwards, just really puts me off.
***
When we walked into Surreal I saw Sophie and her friend from Sydney (Mo?) sitting at one of the tables. They and Liz (who works at Surreal) were splitting the big dessert platter, and Nat and I ordered the chocolate mud cake, which he quite fancied as well. At first it didn't have the rum but I went and asked the bartender if he could dribble some on. Nat and I agreed that it totally made the whole dessert. This time the cake was huge, and had icing which I didn't care for instead of heaps of the fudge, but it was still tasty. For some reason sometimes I just really enjoy things on my own. I mean, when I went in the night before I enjoyed it so much better, and when I try to do something a second time it just isn't as good.
I suppose that's a good metaphor for my transient life. I'm trying new things to see what I like, but when I expect the same thing a second time I don't have the same feeling for it as the first time. It's that way with food, drinks, places, people, experiences. Americans are so used to things being standardized now, such as Starbucks and McDonalds, and we eat out so often that we want people to make things as we would make it or want it ourselves, and lose the element of authenticity and uniqueness. I found myself feeling quite finicky and picky about everything this week, wanting things to be exactly the way I wanted, such as that mud cake the second time, or having dinner at Pub on Wharf two nights in a row and not enjoying it the second time, or wanting my drinks made a specific way, with exactly this much ice, or that much lime, and in a certain glass, and needing to walk before dessert, or even needing dessert at all. I feel bad for both Nat and Agustin who have had to put up with a caffeine-infused Anna, being strung out and moody with a compromised judgement from too much alcohol. Sometimes even one beer or wine is too much, and I appreciate the fact that Nat is learning that I don't fancy drinking and can respect that.
Much later than it should have been, our night came to a close and I walked up home after giving Nat a hug and saying goodbye. It's odd how I thought he lived up in Sunshine Bay, when he lives right near Ant behind the gardens. That would explain why it only took 3 minutes to get to my house instead of 15 when they picked me up on Saturday! I think I got home after 10, but I still got fairly decent sleep as I can recall.
Wednesday 21 July
My Saturday night. Maybe that just says it all. I was quite excited for Ladies Night again at Minami, and knew I wouldn't be meeting everyone until 6pm so I decided to make the most of the sunny, warm afternoon after 2 days of gloom and I took a full hour to walk up to Fresh Choice and Mediterranean Market to get groceries. My food stores are getting quite thin and rotty at home, and I was craving some fresh red cabbage and cauliflower, my two veggie staples here since you can get a half a head of each for $2.49. The red cabbage at Med Market was delicious, and didn't have a slimy feel to the plastic wrap like the ones at Fresh Choice tend to, and the cauliflower was actually cheaper as well.
I enjoyed a nice fresh steamed salad of red cabbage, cauliflower and spinach which I made at 5:30pm in the microwave at work after most people had gone home and I was pretty much done for the day. I'm really glad I'm able to store a few things in the fridge and make them at work; I'm slowly finding more and more ways to make the office job work, as well as save a lot of effort. In a way it's allowing me my vices though, since I can keep the food at work instead of having to head home to drop it off, and every night this week I have gone out on the town after work, whereas last week I at least went straight home on Tuesday!
Most people will pre-drink before they go out, but as I told Erin and Helen as we entered I pre-ate so I might have a chance at feeling full from sushi dinner. The trouble with Minami is that even though the $10 is a good price you have to order several dishes of sushi to feel full, and the sake compliments both the food and the mood of the evening so well you have to have one or two, bringing the cost of dinner close to or over $30, which I suppose is ok for a special occasion such as Ladies Night!
This Wednesday things weren't as cohesive as the previous week. Everyone arrived at different times, with Dottie, Viviana and the third Helen of the group arriving just after 7pm from a leadership training session, and everyone ordered food at different times. I waited a while, being actually quite sated from my steamed veggies. I certainly wish I were hungrier. I want to enjoy food as much as I do after I ski all day, but even taking walks or carrying heavy things in the office just doesn't work up the same appetite, and I miss that. I love eating, and it's a much different feel than in summer, when I enjoy eating light.
I ordered the box dinner, which included rice, miso soup and a box containing 4 (or 6?) pieces of sashimi, 3 muscles, 4 or 6 pieces of tempura including prawn, a small green salad and mouth-wateringly deliciously tender beef teriyaki which I draped over my white rice and enjoyed thoroughly with a touch of wasabi, all for $25, normally $35. I suppose I had things reversed – last week I should have ordered the box which would have filled me up, and this week I should have just gone with nigiri since my stomach wasn't empty. I also enjoyed two bottles of sake, which I like to have as I'm finishing my meal because I don't want it to dull the flavor.
A bunch of the group went to do pole dancing, which I knew I would be too full for after such a delicious dinner, and when I found out it was $30 I was definitely glad I hadn't had it in my mind to go. I think I had heard that it included a glass of champagne, but after a long day at work and a filling dinner, champagne and pole dancing would be the last thing I'd have energy for!
I went with Ruth and Minami over to Dux to pick up the guys around 7:30pm, and waited as they had a round of drinks and chatted with Sam, Ben their housemate, and his friend from Sydney, Dan. I was unpleasantly sobering up, the bad side of waiting until after eating to start drinking, especially after eating so much food, but when we got to Fraser's for $2.50 beers I downed the two I had paid for and then allowed Sam to grab me another after he got back from looking into the pool competition at Harry's. Ugh, beer, why?
I chatted with Sam for a while about going to England in May, and told him I was jealous of the extent of his travels on his trip to Wyoming, and we discussed how much better it was to visit areas just outside of the metropolis, and see the real side of where you are visiting since it just adds so much more to the experience. I told him if he and Ruth come to NY at any time we could stay with my relatives, and I think they would really enjoy it.
Before we left I met their friend Duncan, who was quite a pleasant fellow while only slightly pissed, and quite irritating when completely trashed. He was deciding whether to attend the ski instructor training in the morning, or if he would get in trouble for canceling in the morning. My friends are starting to get a day or two off now, which is nice, and Sam and Ruth had Thursday off, and the following week would maybe have Friday as well. We certainly were making a night of it, and I was enjoying just going where the night took me, even though in the back of my mind I felt compelled to meet up with Matty relatively soon since it was his birthday after all. That and I especially hate when people flake out and therefore can't stand when I do it myself.
Not surprisingly, we made our way, Sam, Duncan and myself, to Daruma, the sake bar, which was quite lively (nigiyakana!) with some fun young Japanese bartenders. Ruth and Minami had already been enjoying some sake when we arrived and we grabbed a spot at the bar next to them. I definitely liked the scene in there, a very quaint little place with tapa-style Japanese food and enough sake to drown in, with a beer tap especially for sake bombs. Oh sake bombs – why am I so cheap? I just hate spending all my money on drinking, especially when I had spent so much at the supermarket, on dinner, on drinks... Yeah I'll have one. It's a selfish thing to say, but it was that time of night for guys to start buying me drinks. I said no to the sake bomb due to lack of funds, and did feel a bit guilty when one of the guys bought a round of sake bombs for all of us.
Before leaving I had a taste of a few types of sake that Ruth and Sam were exploring after carefully examining the menu. We went, finally, up to Whiskey Room, at about 9:30pm or maybe even almost 10pm, and Ruth had decided to head home for the night. When we arrived I saw Matty, looking smart in a nice white button down shirt, thin with that sort of wrinkled casual texture, looking still quite sober, as he attested to from his huge dinner not allowing him to get drunk. I definitely knew how he felt, though after all the carbonation from the beers I was feeling it bypass the food and settle into my blood. One reason why I love rice is that it makes you full at the end of your meal, but you don't feel full all night like you do with meat.
At Whiskey Room I was greeted by both Matty, a friendly bartender, and the most delicious Long Island Iced Tea I've ever had, with freshly squeezed lemon juice, nice and tart, and by that point I don't think I would have tasted too much of the alcohol as it was! I have an issue with the lack of customer service in some of the shops and sometimes bars and restaurants, but in general these bars have a good stock of fresh fruit and ingredients and take the time to make a tasty drink instead of just pumping them out, good for the customer for sure, especially when you're paying upwards of ten to fifteen dollars for a cocktail!
Our intention was to follow Matty, and his friends who had already headed over, to Revolver (or was it just Surreal?), but instead we stopped in at Harry's Pool Bar to check out the status of the competition and ended up staying there for quite some time. I was chatting with Nat for a while and Sam and Duncan went off to play pool. As usual Nat offered me a drink and as usual I declined, but said I could probably do with some Red Bull or something to keep my energy going. After a short while he brought me my cool, refreshing addiction in a tall glass with a straw up to where I was hanging out near the pool table Sam and Duncan were using.
While we were in Daruma Duncan had been telling me about how he went to Austria and started up a tour company with his girlfriend he found there and his friend and his girlfriend. He seemed like an interesting person, but my tolerance for him drops off quickly the more drinks he's had. He and Sam went back to the bar and asked me to watch the pool table so I sipped at my drink and after a few minutes of realizing they wouldn't be back right away (that night we didn't really go anywhere right away) I started talking to some guys from Australia who had just gotten into town (this is a very popular theme for me at Harry's) and were playing pool at the table next to me.
When Sam and Duncan returned I told them I was going to Surreal to meet Matty, since I felt we had abandoned him, and made my way over. I used the bathroom upstairs after walking through the place and found Matty on my way back down. He told me everyone was over at Chico's and they had just come back to Surreal to meet me, so we went over to Chico's, where I wasn't able to convince him to go to Harry's with me, where I kinda wanted to keep talking to the Australian guys. The live music at Chico's was good, and the ambiance was interesting, with a rathskeller feel, but on the second floor of the building. It was a good atmosphere, though I wasn't sure what theme they were going for with a name like Chico's and stone décor on the second floor with a band playing rock music. I was quite unhappy to have been included in a round of jager shots, having consumed my fair share of both calories and alcohol not only for the night but for the week; I may be the only person I know that has such a distaste for getting free drinks. It's not that I don't appreciate it, but it gets to be a bit much, especially when I feel obligated and I just don't want to mix drinks, and at the end of the night things tend to get messy.
I did break free for a bit to head back to Harry's where I left Duncan and Sam. They were starting to close up around 2am, and though he wasn't making a drunken scene Duncan was cut off, and I managed to lose both of them though we left together. I think Sam had probably headed home and I assumed mistakenly that Duncan had done the same.
When I arrived back at Chico's I met Agustin from Buenos Aires and Michael from Ireland who both work at the Rees and were out for a good time. After Matty got up with the band to sing a quite animated “Hey Joe” and then got lost in talking to his other friends I decided to head to Debajo with Agustin and Michael. We danced for maybe an hour or so before walking in the general direction of home up Frankton Rd. I said my goodbyes when I got to Dublin and trekked up the frosty steep streets to my bed around 4:30am, having set my alarm for the last minute at 8:15am.
Thursday 22 July
I still managed to get into work at 8:59am by the office phone clock. Well, at least I waited until Wednesday of this week to have my Friday. I was exhausted internally all morning at work, though I don't think I actually had alcohol still in my system, and the bags under my eyes were starting to show. I knew tonight was going to be big, with Anna's last day and the party at Bardeaux, so I tried to play it cool, and made plans with Agustin to have curry for dinner, which really turned out to be a mistake since it was so rushed and I had already had 3 solid drinks in the office bar which I was quite thirsty for.
When I walked into the office bar at 5:30pm Al introduced me to the young Mexican guy who was behind the bar, telling him I was single and telling me to get around the bar to introduce myself properly. He didn't thrill me much, and after realizing he didn't know the first thing about bartending I edged my way into conversation on the other side of the bar.
My first drink was a nice relaxing Makers Mark and coke, which disappeared quite quickly since I had been saving my stomach for the eating and drinking I knew I would do that night. Next I wanted to try the Russian Standard, which was quite good on the rocks (which this Mexican guy didn't even know how to make), to which I added some Red Bull, my first mistake of the evening. I really love the taste of it, and I figured that with my exhaustion it wouldn't keep me up all night so I had my Red Bull and vodka, continued talking with everyone, and excused myself around 6:30pm to go meet up with Agustin. Catherine suggested I have another one before leaving so I tried the Russian Standard Imperial with soda, which for some reason wasn't as good.
By the time I met Agustin downstairs by Tandoori Palace I was already well inebriated, and was a bit shocked that he decided to bring wine, and that it was a Reisling at that. Oh no, this whole dinner was a huge mistake, I could tell! I just wish I had been able to spend a little more quality time with him, instead of rushing from the office bar down to dinner and then out to Bardeaux, and I couldn't really enjoy a Reisling after drinking so much, nor could I really enjoy it with food, let alone curry. He had obviously put some thought into this date, and I felt bad that I couldn't give it the time it deserved. The other thing that turned my night into a disaster is that there were really tasty h'ors devours at Bardeaux, which I was munching on like I didn't know where my next meal was coming from. It's hard to resist salmon with capers, especially when it all slides down so easily and with so much flavor.
I had ordered the Lamb Palak at Tandoori Palace and asked for it extremely spicy, but when I started to eat it I could hardly even taste it, and knowing I was on a date I should have kept my mouth shut, but oh it was such a disaster. The food I ordered was tasteless, the wine was too sweet, and I was already too drunk and in a hurry to relax and enjoy my friend's company. The date was about as much of a mess as these last two paragraphs.
We arrived at Bardeaux just after 7:30pm and it was busy but not so crowded that it was uncomfortable. I introduced Agustin to Giana and some of my other co-workers and Catherine handed us our champagne. After a few more greetings we found a place by the fire to hang our jackets and I said hi to Claire and Will. She was still wearing her ski boots and was a little self-conscious about her ski bum look, but honestly there were enough people in there enjoying themselves with h'ors devours and champagne that it would have taken a very snobby person to really care about what anyone was wearing.
This was my first time into Bardeaux actually, and it reminds me a bit of where Eddie works in Park City, a very low candle-lit wine bar atmosphere with a roaring wood fireplace and wine bottles decorating the walls. The bartenders have crisply ironed shirts, long black aprons and finely presented yellow ties with not a hair or whisker out of place.
I continued pigging out on the h'ors devours, to the point where I'm quite certain I made a bad impression, and I truly wish we hadn't done dinner and had just met at Bardeaux. I felt the fatigue creeping up on me again, and contrary to my better judgement I decided to stay out and be social rather than realizing I was tired and heading home. After a few drinks it's hard to just sit at home by yourself – you feel this energy that isn't truly there, and the desire for intimacy and to continue eating and drinking and being surrounded by people. I suggested to Agustin that we go for some ice cream – perhaps I was so warm in the fire-toasty bar, and after so many drinks, that ice cream seemed like a good idea, because goodness knows I certainly didn't need to eat anything anymore.
The trip to Patagonia was the second huge mistake and I feel like an idiot for meeting up with Agustin at all with the way I was eating and drinking myself to death. I should have spent the time with people from work instead of making a fool of myself on this date and as usual, trying to do too much at once. When we were in Patagonia selecting the type of ice cream was easy enough, but I expected ice cream served in a “dish” to be served on a “plate” and not in a tiny tiny plastic cup that wouldn't even be large enough for you to pee in for the doctor. I already have a bit of a chip on my shoulder about Patagonia being so cold, and I definitely brought my attitude with me, arguing for the second time that night over how I wanted something served to me. I had wanted the ice cream in a dish so that we could share it, and it was obvious that Agustin wanted a cone, which I said would be difficult to share, so when he tried to grab a cup the guy behind the counter said he would have to charge us for it. The guy just wasn't making anything easier, and seemed quite unhappy about giving samples of ice cream to begin with, then when I made it clear I wanted it on a plate he just was not very helpful at all. I wouldn't have even minded paying more to have the ice cream presented nicely on a plate, especially since I had made up my mind to be paying for dessert. Agustin, still in date-mode pulled out his wallet but this time I was able to stop him from paying. I don't know what it is but... I just feel so odd, about Nat paying for everything the other night, though I did manage to pay for my fish n chips, and Agustin paying for everything on our date. Maybe it's just that I feel a “date” is too much and I just want to hang out, but can't afford to spend so much money. Well, I'm sure things will sort themselves out; I just hope I didn't make too horrible an impression. I messaged Agustin yesterday to tell him I enjoyed the date but haven't heard from him yet so I just hope I'm more pleasant next time we meet, if we even do.
I said goodbye to Agustin at the corner near the post office, telling him I was going to head up the road that way, and gave him the bottle of wine from my bag, telling him I just wouldn't drink it at home and he should take it because he has friends at home to drink it with. I just hope he didn't see all that as a rejection – I was irritable, freakin' tired, and the truth is the wine would have gone to waste. Even as I write this I am still pretty tired, especially after 3 hours of typing! I could use a bit more sleep now too to boost my mood.
I had received a text from Ben that he was at Brazz with some mates, so I decided to stop in their briefly and say hi before heading back up the hill around 10:30pm.
Friday 23 July
I had yet another Friday on Friday. On Thursday Chris had asked me to bartend at the Eagles tribute concert at Memorial Hall at 7pm, which I quite enthusiastically accepted, having a gut feeling I would be asked to babysit. I did get a text that afternoon asking if I could babysit, but I wanted to make a good impression in order to be asked to bartend again, and it would have been a nice change from sitting in the house, especially since I was expecting to hang out with the people I would be working with afterwards.
I was doing quite well on Friday, only eating a light lunch of veggies with Tabasco sauce and then walking all the way up to Fernhill to the Tanoa Aspen Hotel to get my fish n chip dinner. I thoroughly enjoyed the exercise but the truth of the matter is that it was so unbelievably stinky walking up to Fernhill at 5pm with all the cars and trucks passing by. I enjoyed the walk by the lake and even up the first part of the hill, but up by Sainsbury Rd near the steep part where I was breathing every so slightly heavier it just became unbearable and I had to put my neck warmer over my nose, which still didn't really curb the stench going up into my head, though it probably deflected some of the dirt being tossed up into the air. I'll have to find another after-work walk, maybe by the frisbee golf course instead, or by the water on the Frankton path.
I should have enjoyed my delicious fish n chips dinner at a table alone by the window, but of course I had to try to be social, and stayed at the bar talking to Jason, the bartender who always serves me fish n chips and remembers me, and chatted a bit to a Texan named Dominick who seemed to either know or be traveling with an Australian who I didn't formally meet.
The walk up the hill, other than the pollution, was relaxing – it was Anna-time, a time for me to chill out and be alone between the two jobs, and like I did on Monday, I should have kept it that way and read my book. I had ordered the Merlot, which I only had a sip of before my dinner arrived, and it tasted flavorless, like it was either too young or someone had left the bottle open for a few days, but I didn't want to say anything. I wasn't really there for the alcohol; in fact, I was going to try to refrain from drinking, maybe one drink max, for a few days, and I felt like I was sick of complaining about food not being exactly the way I wanted it. I had eaten every single meal out this week, exclusive of my morning porridge at work, and I just wasn't satisfied. The fish n chips, however, were incredibly satisfying, the chips nice and warm and crispy and the fish savory, tender and fresh. I almost wanted to order another fillet it was so delicious.
I didn't want to get drunk from the wine, but I did want to have a few sips of a delicious red wine so I told Jason it just didn't have any flavor, the way it did last time I had it. He told me that the last time I was up, when I was there with Sam and Ruth for the fireworks, they had a much nicer bottle open that they had to use up. Well, that sort of ruins it for me. I thought I was getting a decent wine with my meal, though the Sauvignon Blanc I had when I was there with Owen was tasty and complimented the meal extremely well, though now I'm just not sure if it was from the right bottle. I actually felt a bit uncomfortable when I entered, and Jason implied that Owen was my boyfriend, and then before I left asked for my number. It's odd how I really am looking for someone right now, but I feel in a way like I'm getting propositioned by all the wrong people. I do miss Bart, but he is leaving tomorrow, and I'm pretty sure if he wanted to see me this week for dinner or anything that he would have made it happen.
Knowing I was quite discontented with the wine Jason poured me a Pinot Noir, which was actually just as tasteless as the Merlot, but perhaps at that point it may have been because I had mixed so many strong flavors with the fish n chips. I felt obligated to pretend I was enjoying it though I was actually craving just a sip or two of that crisp, cold Sauvignon Blanc I had last time, and again I made the mistake of getting a little tipsy when I was intending to not drink. Why I had this idea in my head that I would be happier bartending a little buzzed at this particular event, on this particular night, is something that could only have been caused by this weird anxiety that I've felt all week that's been causing me to make horrible horrible decisions in search of transient comfort and happiness.
I was able to hitch a ride quickly back down into town with a nice woman who dropped me right off at Memorial Hall. It's sort of funny how when I was trying to get a ride the bus came right by and I thought to myself how people might not pick me up, thinking how cheap I am to have the bus right there and not take it, just looking for a free ride, and how the car or two right behind the bus would never pick me up, but interestingly enough the woman who picked me up was in the car directly behind the bus. The world is a good place.
The experience working at Memorial Hall was quite a good one, and other than the Red Bull I snagged during the first half of the show, I was quite well-behaved food-wise. I was a little disappointed that my dinner had filled me up so much, and was hoping maybe the Red Bull would aid in digestion, but even after the intermission when I started to snack on the cheese platter items that were sitting around, I didn't feel truly hungry.
At the end of the night I was surprised how much extra booze we had. The concert hall was not even half full, most likely because the ticket prices were $61, around the same age as the people there, but still it seemed like we had an extraordinary amount of extra items, which only took forever for us to pile back in the truck. I suppose the reason for ordering so damned much was because Beaver Liquor will take back what we don't sell. Still... I feel it could have been better planned, and I was talking with Stu, one of the other bartenders, and he was telling me how wasteful Good Group tends to be, especially with events like this. I told him it seemed like all the bars were over-staffed for the amount of people coming through, and it was odd that in a country that pays a wage they would be over-staffed moreso than in a country that doesn't even pay its service staff a proper wage.
I probably made around $14 an hour for the 4 hours I worked last night, but in general food and alcohol is the supplemented payment for hospitality workers, exactly what I don't need any more of, especially this week! We were welcome to the left over pies, and I had half of the venison one to try it. By half I mean the inside half. The warm venison chunks were deliciously tender and cooked just perfectly. It was a shame they were ruined by the super nasty super salty gravy they put in pies, but I enjoyed the meat just the same. I had tried a bit of the curry chicken pie, which didn't thrill me terribly, but for the most part I'm trying to stay away from pies. I'm just glad I wasn't drunk otherwise I probably would have eaten embarrassing amounts of food.
I walked with Amy and Leanne over to Skybar, where we enjoyed a $100 bar tab set up for us by Chris, of which I enjoyed a diet coke, which I hope to God they didn't charge for, and before we left a virgin bloody mary since I was sorta craving tomato juice. Knowing that in a given night I can either enjoy a lot of food or a lot of drink but not both, I decided to go with the food, and I sat by the gas fireplace with Amy and Leanne, relaxing on the leather couches and pigging out on the cheese and crackers platter, which I truly wish I had been more hungry for, but the fish n chips really filled me up! This lack of physical activity is really taking its toll on me, not so much physically, but mentally – I'm just used to being able to eat and drink more without feeling so full!
The boys showed up about an hour later and finished off the bar tab and a bit more of the cheese. There was so much food left over as well – boxes of crackers which could keep, but also boxes of cheese-platter cheeses, which we had brought to Skybar. There were two loaves of french bread, which we would have cut up and put on the cheese platters if we had actually sold one. I believe in all we sold one pie and a few sandwiches, but like I said, the concert was pretty quiet. The music was nice though – I really did enjoy the music, the company and the food for the night.
After Skybar we intended to go to Debajo to dance but they were charging $20 at the door because they had Ministry of Sound DJs and we just didn't have the desire to pay. Instead we stopped in at Ballarat where I said hey to Floyd and then went upstairs to Winnie's. Stu and Leanne decided to go home at that point because Leanne had organized a ski trip to Cardrona today and it was already 1am, so I went up to Winnie's with Amy and Paddy. Paddy works as a duty manager at Dux and is going to start working at Barmuda as well. He's quite cute, in like an adorable and sweet way, but not so much in a crazy hot sort of way, and definitely a nice guy. I'd like to stop in to Dux to say hi some time, but I just can't do the drinking thing anymore – I can't even do a polite beer here and there, unless I just had a few sips to not feel awkward, but not coming close to finishing a beer would make me feel even more awkward.
I hadn't had anything alcoholic since the wine earlier in the night, other than a sip of Amy's half and half drink which was quite tasty – half Red Bull half ginger beer with vodka, so I was mostly just along for the ride, people-watching and such, and enjoying the ambiance of the town. After Winnie's we went to Buffalo Club, which I was sick of after about 30 seconds, but Paddy wanted to go there because his friends hook him up with free drinks, and then we stopped in to World Bar, where I refused to get a pointless stamp on my arm and the security guy let me go in because I was making a fuss (again!). We stopped into Surreal afterwards, which I quite enjoyed. We sat at a booth for a little while, and I lied down and closed my eyes and commented on the fact that I quite enjoyed the fact that half my body was dancing and half my body was sleeping. I am a bit odd in that I'm quite content falling asleep in a late night bar playing house music.
After too short a time in Surreal we tried to head around to Debajo again, thinking perhaps at 3am they would let us in, but instead we decided to go our separate ways and go home. Seeing all the cabs driving about I decided to hail one over by Brazz, and to get just below my house on Edinburgh was only $5.80 which was quite nice! It took me a while to wind down, so I chatted with Meg on Facebook, emailed my mom a few times, and then settled into my happy place playing Star Ocean until I fell asleep.